The Horror - “Tooth and Claw” & “Tomb of the Cybermen”
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So… Thrill to the escapades of a deeply flirtatious Doctor and Rose! Shudder at the depiction of a not-too-monstrous Queen Victoria! Gasp at Porter’s startling ranking! Gently expel flatulence at John’s inability to fully explain the fate of the monks! These are the terrors that await as you experience Tooth and Claw!
Then, sufficiently horrified, wander into a spooooky Hong Kong television archive and discover a rack of dusty film canisters containing the lost-but-now-found 2nd Doctor classic, The Tomb of the Cybermen! Will Porter fall in love with the mighty Patrick Troughton and his Cosmic Hobo? Will John sigh with relief at shoehorning the Cybermen into the watch order just three episodes before their New Series debut?
Should you fear Fear Her and it’s frightening fable of fraught families? Well, sure, if you have nothing else to do, why not? Which pretty much sums up this episode of NNTMP as Porter and John do what is necessary to get to the next episode of the podcast.
Cheers! The West Wing! Fawlty Towers! These are just some of the many other shows referenced in this episode as Porter and John attempt to explore the Land of Fiction and find there are probably a lot of other more interesting fictions than we saw in the somewhat oddball Second Doctor tale of The Mind Robber. Will Porter get chicken pox and be replaced by someone who looks sorta like Porter but isn’t actually him? And will John even notice given that, as we have established, podcasts are an entirely audio medium?
Macra May Kill You - "Gridlock" & "The Macra Terror"
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Oh no! NNTMP has got Crabs! And, as if things couldn’t get any more dystopian, we’ve also got traffic! And… AND… cats driving. AND… AND… AND cats driving while wearing HATS! So, yeah, there are, apparently, dark days ahead for humanity, but fear not Probers, because John and Porter have slapped on their “Dogged Persistence” patches and stared unflinchingly into the Face of Boe as they grapple with some bumper-to-bumper Gridlock.
We then follow on to a 2nd Doctor, Ben, Polly, and Jamie classic via the fairly obvious link, which of course is… the dystopian future. NO! It’s not Macra. THERE ARE NO SUCH THINGS AS MACRA (story title excepted – there are such things as terrors related to said non-existent Macra)! If this discussion between John and Porter seems a bit more animated to you, then in all probability it’s because they are taking on some missing episodes now returned to us through the exciting innovation of cartoons matched to the original soundtracks. So join them for a heapin’ helpin’ of Surf ‘n’ Mind Control Gas as they confront The Something-Something Terror!
Of course, it’s not clear why these Daleks are still wandering around gettin’ all human when we find out that the Second Doctor engineered their “final end” way back in 1967! In addition to forgetting that they already had been wiped out, those Manhattan Daleks must have also forgotten that they had already been mucking about with the human factor too. But, as the old saying goes, NNTMP never forgets, and so Porter and John enter the murky world of off-air audio recordings supplemented with blurry black-and-white photos as they try to get to the root of The Evil of the Daleks. Oh, and they also decide whether humanity in general is good or evil. In the last 10 minutes.
Time, Lord, Is On Our Side - "The End of Time" & "The War Games"
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Clear your calendars, Probers, because we have got 7 (SEVEN!) hours of Who to discuss… which turns out to only need about 20 more minute in the Podcast.
We kick off our epic look at epics with the epic conclusion of David Tennant’s epic run as the 10th Doctor (which itself is really just the two-part epic finale to his epic lap of honor). Yes, he doesn’t want to go, and we can tell because he has been saying goodbye for about 6 episodes at this point. But, as we say, there’s one more epic to get under our belts and it’s a doozy as John Simm returns as a resurrected Master who can really tuck into a turkey. He’s got a diabolical plot to save the BBC on casting and actor salaries by becoming EVERYONE, which would in itself be a heck of a cliffhanger, but then – BAM! – out of nowhere we get James freakin’ Bond himself, Timothy Dalton, just bustin’ in all, “Hey, guess what? Gallifrey’s back and I am Rassilon. Bitches.” And then we still get Wilf, Donna, Sylvia Noble, Sarah, Martha, Mickey, Jack, Alonzo, and soom Ood. Oh yeah, and then Matt Smith shows up. It’s a heck of a story and we could go into more detail if we hadn’t already reached… The End of Time!
A two-hour Doctor regeneration story?! That has to be one heck of a grand finale! Pshaw, say Malcolm Hulke and Terrance Dicks from back in 1969. Feast your eyes on 10 (TEN!) episodes of classic Who as Patrick Troughton ends his reign as Doctor #2. It’s a gradual reveal (I mean, they had the time) as the Doctor, Jamie, and Zoe find themselves caught up in World War I… and the US Civil War… and some vague Roman war thing…. We quickly learn never to trust people with glasses as we discover a fiendish alien plot to build the universe’s greatest fighting force. A plot slightly marred by some really bitchy interoffice rivalry between the War Chief and the Security Chief. And, as if that’s not enough… once again the Time Lords show up in the epic conclusion! Only, this time, it’s the FIRST time they’ve ever shown up in Doctor Who. Porter and John can barely contain the excitement as they take sides on The War Games!
The Trojan Dalek - "Victory of the Daleks" & "The Power of the Daleks"
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But before we come to grips with sneaky Daleks, let’s take a moment to celebrate our 50th episode! Yes, many said we couldn’t do it. They said the world was too saturated in Podcasts. They said we lacked the requisite connections to turn NNTMP into nothing short of an international, dare we say, phenomenon. Well, they were right – but we did it anyway!
As if 50 eps wasn’t momentous enough, our stories this week pack in the momentousness. We begin with 11th Doctor Matt Smith’s historic first meeting with the Daleks – made even more historic by the inclusion of the historic Winston Churchill during the historic Blitz when the Nazis were trying to make the UK history. The Daleks, themselves moved by all the historicness, decide to roll out a super fab redesign that answers the question, “What if the Daleks were the same color as M&Ms?” The answer is that they would be deeply unpopular. But not unpopular enough to thwart The Victory of the Daleks!
We then return rocket back to perhaps the single most important story in Doctor Who history – which must be why it was immediately lost by the BBC. Anyhow… it’s the debut of Patrick Troughton as Doctor #2, confusing the hell out of the youth of Britain who were desperately trying to understand what had happened. Ol’ Pat is not immediately helpful to his friends Ben and Polly or to the audience, but fortunately the Daleks are around to comfort us by sinisterly manipulating the colonists, driving a scientist insane, and then just mass slaughtering everyone in sight. The Omnibot 2000 they are most certainly not. Join Porter and John as they get a charge out of The Power of the Daleks.
